Weekly Coaching Tips: Quit the Blame Game

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Quit the blame game#4 of 7 Coaching Tips for Becoming a Better Coaching-Based Leader

If you tend to default to blaming or judging others when you feel they are wrong or deficient in some way, it’s game over when it comes to coaching.

You can begin to step out of the blame game by noticing your reactions in day-to-day situations. Stop yourself if you find yourself assessing what’s “wrong” with someone and begin to get curious about the person’s perspective.

Whatever the person is doing, it makes perfect sense to them. Get curious about how they are making sense of the situation. A good way to begin your exploration is to ask the person you’re judging to “Tell me more about…” whatever you’re reacting to. Then listen with a willingness to learn something new.

Think of this approach as a new, more appreciative and productive “game.” One where everyone wins.

Would you like to know how you are doing with your transition to coaching-based leadership? Take Cylient’s Coaching-Based Leadership Assessment and find out.

Look for Coaching Tip #5 next week, where you’ll learn how to recognize the many faces of fear. Read Coaching Tip #3 here.

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